Wednesday, September 4, 2019

Expectations

People can really irritate you when they don't live up to your expectations.  Whether or not you realise it, the expectations we have of others maybe irrational or unrealistic.  We expect people to behave in a specific way in certain situations, when they don't we usually become annoyed.  

Sometimes it's ourselves being unreasonable, sometimes, it's the other person being unreasonable.  

When you find yourself becoming aggravated by someone because they are not meeting your expectations, just stop for a moment and ask yourself, is it me being unreasonable, or is it them?

Thursday, August 29, 2019

Know When It's Time To Leave

During my career, I have seen people who are truly unhappy with where they are in the work they are doing.  Unfortunately they stay in "dead end" and "get nowhere" jobs way past the time they should have been onto the next step in their careers.  While many people  have their reasons, whether it be their own shortcomings, like they just don't have the confidence in themselves or are afraid to make a move, or the health benefits or whatever have you.  Staying at a job when you are miserable is just not conductive of a life well lived. 

How do you know it's time to move on?  There are a few questions you need to ask yourself and you have to be brutally honest with yourself. 

1. Are you proud of the work you are doing?  Can you still be part of the "team" and add quality & value to your position?  Or has your position become mundane, automatic and boring?  If you find yourself making careless mistakes constantly, and don't really care, you have pretty much given up on your position.   If you can't be proud of a job well done, you need to start looking at other options.

2. Do you find it hard to get out of bed in the morning and loath going to work?  Are you late or absent all the time?  On average an employee is absent 1 day every 2 months and should not be late more than 1 time every 3 months.  If you find yourself sleeping through your alarm, not leaving your house till late, getting to work late all the time.  This is usually caused by depression because you are not happy in your current position, you need to start looking at other options.

3.  Are you mad and feel slighted at work?  Do you feel no matter how hard you try or how much you accomplish, it's just never enough?  You are looking for validation to stay at a job that just does not work for you any longer.  Sometimes it's hard to pull off that bandaid and make the move.  We all get comfortable in our jobs after a few years but knowing that you have outgrown a position and making moves to go onto the next step, is the adult thing to do.   Don't be mad, just move along.  You will never get the validation you seek from your current job, you need to start looking at other options.

4.  Does the negative energy at work follow you home?  If you are constantly fretting over your position and the issues you have with it, obviously you are not happy.  Everyone complains on occasion about their positions or co workers or the commute but when you go out of your way and bring this bad mojo home with you consistently, it's a sign you need to start looking at other options.

5.  Is the environment toxic?  A toxic work environment is one that will eventually take a toll on your health or mental well being.  Its usually rife with narcissistic leadership, little to no enthusiasm among the workers, little and negative communication and a high turnover rate, just to name a few.   It's really hard to know when you first take a job if the environment is actually toxic.  Everyone usually puts their best face on when they are in the process of hiring someone.  However after a few months you should see the signs and that should be the sign for you to start your exit strategy. 

In ending, the choices you make are up to you.  Staying in a "dead end" job will not get you anywhere in life but in the grave a lot sooner than you should be.  It will affect your health and mental well being.  It's also needless, you don't have to put up with a workplace that harbors insecurity or  loathing, you just need to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and move onto the next chapter of your career. 

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Struggles of Life

One day a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable nothing ever worked out for her and she didn't know how she would survive.  She was tired of fighting and struggling and the world being so unfair to her all the time. It always seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.
Her father took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each one on a burner on the stove..

Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then sat at the kitchen table and let them boil, without saying a word to his daughter.

The daughter, moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After
twenty minutes he turned off the burners.  He took the potatoes out of the pot and
placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in another bowl. He
then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.



“Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

Turning to her, he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”
“Potatoes, eggs and coffee,” she hastily replied very annoyed at her father.
“Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noticed that they were soft.
He then asked her to take an egg and peel it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a smile to her face. 
He then explained that the potatoes, eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity - boiling water. However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.
The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.
However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.
“Which one are you?” he asked his daughter.
“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”
Moral of the story: 
In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you choose to react to it and the lessons you take away from those situations. Life is all about learning, adopting and converting all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Crisis at Our Doorstep

While on vacation over the last week, I was able to watch more TV and specifically News, than I have in a while.  One of the stories I heard a number of times is the humanitarian crisis we are having at the mexican/american border.   While I was relaxing for the week there were many people detained at the border, a man and his 18 month old child died by drowning, and 1000's of immigrant children were put into holding camps.

While I feel that things have to be really bad where you are to even consider the hike through hot deserts, dangerous people and the warm (sarcasm) welcome they are getting when they get to the border.  The thing that seriously disgusts me to no end is the treatment of the kids.  Kids do not have a say in where their parents drag them.  If you have a kid under the age of 15, you should know this already.  Are you really going to stand for your 8, 9 or 10 year old kid saying, hey mom, dad, yeah I don't want to make that hike up there, I'll just stay here! No, you will grab them by the ear, shirt, shoulder and point them in the direction you want them to start marching!  Good parents do that, parents that want something better for their kids.

What dawned on me as I sat slack jawed watching this totally Un American fiasco unfold at our borders was that, I am a huge animal rights person.  I love all 4 of my companion pets (2 dogs & 2 cats) and I loose my mother fucking mind when I see or hear stories about puppy mills or overcrowded shelters.  Most people that I know, regardless of how they feel about the crisis at the border, are incessed when they see pictures like this:


But when it comes to these PEOPLE in cages and worst yet, CHILDREN in cages they turn a blind eye to the cruelty and complete disregard for human life.  Is this ok?  In truth, I wouldn't treat my animals like the way these children are being treated.  BABIES crying for their mothers, kids afraid of what may happen to them, toddlers being left on their own.  We don't like when people do this to animals, we call them scum and shit, but we are ok when we do this to human beings....Im NOT ok with this...Not for animals and certainly not for children!

How does this make us "Patriotic"? 
How does this make us "American"?
How does this make us Free, Kind and Compassionate for our fellow human beings?


Do you really walk around in fear thinking that someday one of these kids will kill you or someone you love? REALLY?  Well after how we treat them, I guess I would be afraid of that now too.

And before you start screaming "Obama's fault"  this is happening NOW, and get over Obama already, not all the problems in your life began with Obama and it certainly isn't going to end with Trump.

What would you do if it were YOUR child in one of these pictures?  Is this really ok with you?  

We can not and should not make these kids pay for the sins of their parents.  
Regardless of the reason why their parents sought shelter/amnesty here.  

None of us here today, in this Great country of ours, can trace our roots back to this plot of land (america), we all come from immigrants.  Put yourself in these peoples shoes for one bleeping second.   The Irish, German, Italians, Hungarians, all the eastern europeans that are still coming here, the chinese, japanese, indians, the poor, the disenchanted, the christian, jews and atheists, WE are what make this Country the greatest place on earth!  And this INCLUDES these immigrants.  

Is this really ok with you?  
Is this who you think Americans should be seen as around the world?

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand A mighty woman with a torch, 
whose flame Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother 
Mother of exiles. 
From her beacon-hand Glows
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command 
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she With silent lips. 
"Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
-- Emma Lazarus 1883

Friday, May 24, 2019

Election Results



All the votes are in and I did not win the primary so I will not be on the ballot in November.  I wanted to thank everyone that came out to support me yesterday.  It was a very long day and I met a lot of great Morrisville residences.

I would like to give a special thanks to Mike Yager for all of your help throughout this whole process. I would also like to thank Jane Berger for all of your knowledge of the process and paperwork involved.  I want to thank Jack and Mary for all of their help not only with the election but also with teaching me about the count afterwards.  People don’t really get to learn about what happens AFTER you cast your vote and what goes into actually calculating them.  As tired as I was, it was worth staying there for that education alone.

I also wanted to say that while the day was long it was also a very pleasant day.  Everyone was happy and talked to each other.   In the end it made me believe that even though we may not all always agree on everything we can come together as a community and respect each other with grace and dignity.  We really were the change that we all want to see and I can’t say how much I appreciate that.

Going forward I will still hold my representatives accountable for their actions.  I know that there have been many sore spots lately with people in our town over several issues.   But I believe that we all need to be willing to find a common ground, try to find the things that we can all agree on and try not to focus on the things that divide us.  We need to remember that what may be good for one person may be bad for another, that we are a community with several thousand people, not just a handful that value power over people. 
Your Vote Does Matter
Thank You,
Kelly

Wednesday, May 15, 2019

The Power of Doing Nothing...


An old crocodile was floating at the river’s edge when a younger crocodile swam up next to him,
“I’ve heard from many that you’re the fiercest hunter in all of the river bottoms. Please, teach me your ways.”
Awoken from a nice long afternoon nap, the old crocodile glanced at the young crocodile with one of his reptilian eyes, said nothing and then fell back asleep atop the water.
Feeling frustrated and disrespected, the young crocodile swam off upriver to chase after some catfish, leaving behind a flurry of bubbles. “I’ll show him”, he thought to himself.
Later that day the young crocodile returned to the old crocodile who was still napping and began to brag to him about his successful hunt, 
“I caught two meaty catfish today. What have you caught? Nothing? Perhaps you’re not so fierce after all.”
Unphased the old crocodile again looked at the young crocodile, said nothing, closed his eyes and continued to float atop the water as tiny minnows muched away lightly at the algae on his underbelly.
Again, the young crocodile was angry he couldn’t get a response from the elder, and he swam off a second time upstream to see what he could hunt.
After a few hours of thrashing about he was able to hunt down a small crane. Smiling, he kept the bird in his jaws and swam back to the old crocodile, adamant about showing him who the true hunter was.
As the young crocodile rounded the bend, he saw the elder crocodile still floating in the same spot near the river’s edge.
However, something had changed — a large wildebeest was enjoying an afternoon drink just inches near the old crocodile’s head.
In one lightning fast movement, the old crocodile bolted out of the water, wrapped his jaws around the great wildebeest and pulled him under the river.
Awestruck the young crocodile swam up with the tiny bird hanging from his mouth and watched as the old crocodile enjoyed his 500 lb meal.
The young crocodile asked him, “Please… tell me… how… how did you do that?”
Through mouthfuls of wildebeest, the old crocodile finally responded,
"I did nothing"

Moral of the story...sometimes its best to just do nothing...

Thursday, April 11, 2019

A Talk About Grants




A grant is defined as " a sum of money given by the government or other organization for a particular purpose." 

Grants can come from many different sources, they can be federal, state or even county generated.  Some grants are even granted through private individuals or businesses (think scholarships and research grants).  Grants are applied for and the requirements for applying vary from very simple to very complex.  Many grants require matching or a percentage of funding included in the requirements, other grants do not require any other funding at all, some grants even are diminished/satisfied by time.  Some grants you have to pay to apply for, others are free.  All grants come with specific instructions based on the kind of grant and what the grant will be used for.  There is no "one size fits all" description of what goes into a grant or the grant writing process.  


We hear a lot about what it takes to actually write a grant.  Depending on the amount of funding, where the grant is coming from, what the grant is for and the complexity of the grant usually will decide on who or how the grant gets written.  If the instructions are not adhered to perfectly, usually your application will be turned down.  Also most grants are time sensitive, meaning there is an open window of time when it must be filed as a qualification of the said grant.



Some people make it their life's work to write grants.  There are also companies whose primary service is finding and applying for grants.  There are college classes on how to write grants because they can be so complex, time consuming and difficult to write.  Not everyone is skilled enough to actually write a grant, it is definitely a specific skill that not a lot of people possess.  You do not just pick up this skill by way of a job, its not like typing.  Mostly people that are going into public service or community development will take classes to learn this skill.  

So in ending when you hear someone say that writing grants are easy and anyone can do it, they most likely have no idea what goes into the grant writing process.  










Monday, April 8, 2019

Cornerstone Timeline

You may have heard about the Cornerstone Reports, this is a timeline of the events around those reports along with related news articles.


2011 - Talk and Rumors of possibly dismantling the MPD starts to circulate.  Infighting & law suites plague police department.

July 2012 - Because of the infighting & law suites the solicitor and insurance company recommend an investigation be done.  Council hires Cornerstone Consulting to investigate MPD at the cost of $130,000 Plus $20000 for an audit of the PD since there hasn't been an audit in over 20 years plus, $350 per hour, for a special attorney to review the report.  

December 31, 2012 - Chief Jack Jones Retires

April 2013 - Borough received Cornerstone Report

July 28, 2013 - news breaks about the investigation 
Morrisville Investigates Police Department

July 31, 2013 - After 7 months without a head of the police department, Frederick DeVesa is hired as interim Director.
Interim Police Director Hired

August 2013 - Fredrick DeVesa quits

September 2013 - DeVesa files report from his two weeks at MPD
Scathing Report

October 2013 - At 10 months without a Chief of Police, a group of concerned citizens got together to form the Morrisville Town Watch.  Within the previous month a child abduction happened in town and the citizens were not made aware of it until weeks later.
Town Watch 1
Town Watch 2

November 2013 - Dave Rivella is Elected Mayor

December 2013 - Marks 1 year without a head to the Morrisville PD -
Also Rivella appoints Ted Parker to his vacant Council seat.
Rivella appoints Ted Parker to Vacant Council Seat

December 2013 - Cornerstone Report Mysteriously Disappears
Disappearing Report

January 2014 - 13 Months and still no one is running the Police Department -
More Law Suites ensue
More Law Suites

February 2014 - Chief McClay is sworn in at council meeting
Chief Sworn In


Tuesday, April 2, 2019

All about Me

While I do not have a political background and I do not make the claim that I am a seasoned politician.  I can say that I am a concerned citizen and big fan of the TRUTH and financial responsibility with my tax money.

One of the things that I truly hate about politics is that no one tells you what they have actually accomplished during their time in office.  I will switch the channel or toss that paper into the trash without even opening it if it's just about saying how horrible the other person is.  More often than not it's either something blown totally out of proportion or even made up completely.  I have no doubt it will be the same with this election cycle.  When people don't have any accomplishments, that's what they do.  It's a distraction away from their shortcomings.

I am going to talk today a little about what I feel that I would bring to the table to serve my ward on council.

I have previously worked for the City of Perth Amboy Housing Development Corp.  PAHDC was a division of Perth Amboy community development division. I was hired as bookkeeper and office manager and worked under the Director.

Primarily I kept the books on about 11 different grant programs ranging from CDBG and RCA grant money to Lead Based Paint Abatement and other neighborhood revitalization programs going on at the time.  I was also in charge of the sealed contractor bidding process and participated in planning a number of community outreach programs to clean up properties of seniors/disabled and lower income people that didn't have the ability or funds to do it themselves.  I also worked closely with the director to identify and apply for grants that would benefit neighborhoods in Perth Amboy.  I also received my NJ Notary while I was at PAHDC and I performed administrative duties for a 21 member board.

I ended up leaving PAHDC because my mother was terminally ill so I spent the last few months of her life taking care of her.

Soon after my mother's passing I went back to work for Lifesign LLC which was a bio-meditec company.  They made and distributed rapid medical tests. I was hired as office manager and general accounting and worked under the President of the company.  I managed an office of about 7 people and was responsible for all of the company bookkeeping including payroll, payroll taxes, cafeteria plan, AP/AR, budgeting, HR, Benefit negotiations, sales tax in 7 different states.  While I was at Lifesign I became a certified bookkeeper.

I am currently an Executive Assistant at East Coast News, and work for two wonderful Brothers who own 4 distribution warehouses nationally.  During my time here, I have negotiated contracts for supplies and trade shows, coordinate company travel, been involved with accounting both inhouse and for their other properties, Insurance, property taxes, corporate taxes, and event planning.

So that is me in a nutshell.  I feel with my background I would be an asset to the 4th ward.  I would certainly listen to the people in my ward and diligently answer emails and phone calls.  If I don't have an answer, I would do whatever I can to get an answer.  As a community we have much further to go to make our town what it should be and I would love it, if I could be part of that forward moving team.

Thank you
Kelly

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Lend Me Your Ear

Dear Friends, Family and Colleagues,
Recently, I announced that I would be running for a seat in Morrisville’s Borough Council.
I have decided to run because I believe that I have a lot to offer the town I live in, not only
with the career skills that I have built my entire life, but also because of the unique life
experiences that have brought me to where I am now.
We talk a lot these days about how we want to come together as neighbors, friends and
citizens, but yet we find ways to divide ourselves. I have advocated for many years that we,
as neighbors, as citizens, need to find common ground. To not allow what you think you
know or want personally, to hinder what is for the betterment of all people. I believe in
my heart that this current bipartisan council is where that starts.
Your municipal government affects you more than your state or federal government ever will.
The money that they spend is directly related to your core costs. It includes housing,
whether you rent or own. The infrastructure of your town, are your roads falling apart? The
school system, recreation, businesses, police, fire/ambulance. Outside of your rent or
mortgage, taxes are your next biggest expenditure. We do not need to be taxed any more.
We need people who will spend your tax dollars responsibly. Period.
During this primary, I will be running against some spiteful people. These people are the
remainder of those that have systematically, over the last 20 or so years, stood by as our
streets crumbled, while giving golden parachutes to their cronies. They have hired people
as political favors. They have stifled progress by creating an RCO, which in turn, wasted
taxpayer money for any project that would go out for bid. They allowed our police department
to fall into shambles, to the point it was almost dismantled.
They will try to discredit me, I am more than sure of that. For me to be successful with this
endeavor, I am turning to the people that know me best and asking for your support. I will
need advertising, flyers, signs, mailings, and I cannot do this all alone. I am inviting you all
to get involved with my campaign and help make a difference in this small, historic town.
Your contribution will help so much in getting the word out and to raise the initial funds
needed to launch this campaign. There is no small amount, any amount is more than I could
ask for. If you would like to contribute, please make your check out to “Morrisville Votes” and
mail it directly to me at 562 Doloro Drive, Morrisville, PA 19067. You can also Venmo your
contribution to @Mike-Yager-6 or my paypal account at jadedmage@gmail.com
Sincerely yours,
Kelly Chiavarini

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Recent Events

I know that it's been awhile since I've posted. 😁  While I still seem to have a great viewership, to whoever comes to read what I have written, I thank you & I hope that you find some humor and levity in my musings.

Over the last year or so, I have taken on a number of endeavors, I became a grandparent to a beautiful baby girl and have been working like a mad woman on my career.  

My Etsy store is chugging along wonderfully.  My sales have doubled over the course of the year.  If you are interested in checking it out, there is a link somewhere on the side column or you can click here to get to it > The Curious Charm

I have also recently decided to run for Borough Council in the town I live in. (Morrisville, PA)  Which is probably the biggest news of all.  I have advocated for many years for people to come together because we are all neighbors and citizens of this great country of ours.  I believe that we can and have to find things that we all can agree on.  

One of the reasons I made this decision is because over the 8+ years that I have lived in Morrisville, I have seen this town go from a huge hot mess to resurrection from the ashes in the last year or so.  The first year that I moved here, I almost turned around and moved back out.  I will get into some of the problems and issues that were faced in other blog posts.

That was until I found a group of people that were willing to do whatever it took to really bring this sleepy little historic river town into the future.  This group of people were both Democratic and Republicans, working together. 

This bipartisan group of people is exactly what so many people want to see. I don't know about you but, I am so tired of all the infighting and nothing ever happening because so many people are hung up on labels.  If people would just stop fighting and finger pointing at each other, we can find common ground.  We can do good things, we can be happy and live in peace.  

In ending, I will be putting my mad skills and faith in humanity to the test.  I am sure I am going to have a heck of a road to till but I'm up for the challenge.