Wednesday, September 4, 2019

Expectations

People can really irritate you when they don't live up to your expectations.  Whether or not you realise it, the expectations we have of others maybe irrational or unrealistic.  We expect people to behave in a specific way in certain situations, when they don't we usually become annoyed.  

Sometimes it's ourselves being unreasonable, sometimes, it's the other person being unreasonable.  

When you find yourself becoming aggravated by someone because they are not meeting your expectations, just stop for a moment and ask yourself, is it me being unreasonable, or is it them?

Thursday, August 29, 2019

Know When It's Time To Leave

During my career, I have seen people who are truly unhappy with where they are in the work they are doing.  Unfortunately they stay in "dead end" and "get nowhere" jobs way past the time they should have been onto the next step in their careers.  While many people  have their reasons, whether it be their own shortcomings, like they just don't have the confidence in themselves or are afraid to make a move, or the health benefits or whatever have you.  Staying at a job when you are miserable is just not conductive of a life well lived. 

How do you know it's time to move on?  There are a few questions you need to ask yourself and you have to be brutally honest with yourself. 

1. Are you proud of the work you are doing?  Can you still be part of the "team" and add quality & value to your position?  Or has your position become mundane, automatic and boring?  If you find yourself making careless mistakes constantly, and don't really care, you have pretty much given up on your position.   If you can't be proud of a job well done, you need to start looking at other options.

2. Do you find it hard to get out of bed in the morning and loath going to work?  Are you late or absent all the time?  On average an employee is absent 1 day every 2 months and should not be late more than 1 time every 3 months.  If you find yourself sleeping through your alarm, not leaving your house till late, getting to work late all the time.  This is usually caused by depression because you are not happy in your current position, you need to start looking at other options.

3.  Are you mad and feel slighted at work?  Do you feel no matter how hard you try or how much you accomplish, it's just never enough?  You are looking for validation to stay at a job that just does not work for you any longer.  Sometimes it's hard to pull off that bandaid and make the move.  We all get comfortable in our jobs after a few years but knowing that you have outgrown a position and making moves to go onto the next step, is the adult thing to do.   Don't be mad, just move along.  You will never get the validation you seek from your current job, you need to start looking at other options.

4.  Does the negative energy at work follow you home?  If you are constantly fretting over your position and the issues you have with it, obviously you are not happy.  Everyone complains on occasion about their positions or co workers or the commute but when you go out of your way and bring this bad mojo home with you consistently, it's a sign you need to start looking at other options.

5.  Is the environment toxic?  A toxic work environment is one that will eventually take a toll on your health or mental well being.  Its usually rife with narcissistic leadership, little to no enthusiasm among the workers, little and negative communication and a high turnover rate, just to name a few.   It's really hard to know when you first take a job if the environment is actually toxic.  Everyone usually puts their best face on when they are in the process of hiring someone.  However after a few months you should see the signs and that should be the sign for you to start your exit strategy. 

In ending, the choices you make are up to you.  Staying in a "dead end" job will not get you anywhere in life but in the grave a lot sooner than you should be.  It will affect your health and mental well being.  It's also needless, you don't have to put up with a workplace that harbors insecurity or  loathing, you just need to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and move onto the next chapter of your career. 

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Struggles of Life

One day a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable nothing ever worked out for her and she didn't know how she would survive.  She was tired of fighting and struggling and the world being so unfair to her all the time. It always seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.
Her father took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each one on a burner on the stove..

Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then sat at the kitchen table and let them boil, without saying a word to his daughter.

The daughter, moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After
twenty minutes he turned off the burners.  He took the potatoes out of the pot and
placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in another bowl. He
then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.



“Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

Turning to her, he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”
“Potatoes, eggs and coffee,” she hastily replied very annoyed at her father.
“Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noticed that they were soft.
He then asked her to take an egg and peel it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a smile to her face. 
He then explained that the potatoes, eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity - boiling water. However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.
The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.
However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.
“Which one are you?” he asked his daughter.
“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”
Moral of the story: 
In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you choose to react to it and the lessons you take away from those situations. Life is all about learning, adopting and converting all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Crisis at Our Doorstep

While on vacation over the last week, I was able to watch more TV and specifically News, than I have in a while.  One of the stories I heard a number of times is the humanitarian crisis we are having at the mexican/american border.   While I was relaxing for the week there were many people detained at the border, a man and his 18 month old child died by drowning, and 1000's of immigrant children were put into holding camps.

While I feel that things have to be really bad where you are to even consider the hike through hot deserts, dangerous people and the warm (sarcasm) welcome they are getting when they get to the border.  The thing that seriously disgusts me to no end is the treatment of the kids.  Kids do not have a say in where their parents drag them.  If you have a kid under the age of 15, you should know this already.  Are you really going to stand for your 8, 9 or 10 year old kid saying, hey mom, dad, yeah I don't want to make that hike up there, I'll just stay here! No, you will grab them by the ear, shirt, shoulder and point them in the direction you want them to start marching!  Good parents do that, parents that want something better for their kids.

What dawned on me as I sat slack jawed watching this totally Un American fiasco unfold at our borders was that, I am a huge animal rights person.  I love all 4 of my companion pets (2 dogs & 2 cats) and I loose my mother fucking mind when I see or hear stories about puppy mills or overcrowded shelters.  Most people that I know, regardless of how they feel about the crisis at the border, are incessed when they see pictures like this:


But when it comes to these PEOPLE in cages and worst yet, CHILDREN in cages they turn a blind eye to the cruelty and complete disregard for human life.  Is this ok?  In truth, I wouldn't treat my animals like the way these children are being treated.  BABIES crying for their mothers, kids afraid of what may happen to them, toddlers being left on their own.  We don't like when people do this to animals, we call them scum and shit, but we are ok when we do this to human beings....Im NOT ok with this...Not for animals and certainly not for children!

How does this make us "Patriotic"? 
How does this make us "American"?
How does this make us Free, Kind and Compassionate for our fellow human beings?


Do you really walk around in fear thinking that someday one of these kids will kill you or someone you love? REALLY?  Well after how we treat them, I guess I would be afraid of that now too.

And before you start screaming "Obama's fault"  this is happening NOW, and get over Obama already, not all the problems in your life began with Obama and it certainly isn't going to end with Trump.

What would you do if it were YOUR child in one of these pictures?  Is this really ok with you?  

We can not and should not make these kids pay for the sins of their parents.  
Regardless of the reason why their parents sought shelter/amnesty here.  

None of us here today, in this Great country of ours, can trace our roots back to this plot of land (america), we all come from immigrants.  Put yourself in these peoples shoes for one bleeping second.   The Irish, German, Italians, Hungarians, all the eastern europeans that are still coming here, the chinese, japanese, indians, the poor, the disenchanted, the christian, jews and atheists, WE are what make this Country the greatest place on earth!  And this INCLUDES these immigrants.  

Is this really ok with you?  
Is this who you think Americans should be seen as around the world?

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand A mighty woman with a torch, 
whose flame Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother 
Mother of exiles. 
From her beacon-hand Glows
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command 
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she With silent lips. 
"Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
-- Emma Lazarus 1883

Friday, May 24, 2019

Election Results



All the votes are in and I did not win the primary so I will not be on the ballot in November.  I wanted to thank everyone that came out to support me yesterday.  It was a very long day and I met a lot of great Morrisville residences.

I would like to give a special thanks to Mike Yager for all of your help throughout this whole process. I would also like to thank Jane Berger for all of your knowledge of the process and paperwork involved.  I want to thank Jack and Mary for all of their help not only with the election but also with teaching me about the count afterwards.  People don’t really get to learn about what happens AFTER you cast your vote and what goes into actually calculating them.  As tired as I was, it was worth staying there for that education alone.

I also wanted to say that while the day was long it was also a very pleasant day.  Everyone was happy and talked to each other.   In the end it made me believe that even though we may not all always agree on everything we can come together as a community and respect each other with grace and dignity.  We really were the change that we all want to see and I can’t say how much I appreciate that.

Going forward I will still hold my representatives accountable for their actions.  I know that there have been many sore spots lately with people in our town over several issues.   But I believe that we all need to be willing to find a common ground, try to find the things that we can all agree on and try not to focus on the things that divide us.  We need to remember that what may be good for one person may be bad for another, that we are a community with several thousand people, not just a handful that value power over people. 
Your Vote Does Matter
Thank You,
Kelly