Saturday, May 20, 2017

Social Media Etiquette


Social media is the bane and black hole of our time.  What I thought started out as a wonderful new communication tool has turned into a dark abyss of overly sensitive cry babies and stereotypical jerks.  I have all the major profiles in the social media outlets, I have also connected with people that I thought I had lost touch with many years ago and also made some good lifelong friends via social media.  So it's not all dark, but folks, it's pretty dark at times.

But lets face it, people do and say some of the stupidest things that you know damn well they would never do if they were standing there right in front of you, am I right?

So I want to take some time today to talk about what is not acceptable behavior on social media.  Because, it seems to have taken the place of actual human interaction, there needs to be some ground rules...


  1.  Don't Be rude or offensive for no good reason.  You must be a freaking idiot or just a really mad person, whatever your problem is, stifle it, no one gives a shit how your day is going.  You need to NOT be on social media till you pull out what ever crawled up your buttox then.  Especially if your nastiness has nothing to do with the conversation at hand.
  2. Don't Forward chain messages.  I did not like them when they were sent via regular mail, I really hate them now.  Texting and messaging was meant for sending private messages NOT for your stupid freaking forwards that Oh BTWs you will NOT be getting a million dollars in a half hour or nor will you be getting health, wealth or prosperity by forwarding those stupid things.  If you really want to tell me you love me, how about calling me or stopping by to tell me to my face?  Nes` Pas`?
  3. Don't Bust in and put your stinking 2 cents in when a conversation is obviously not truly public.  Yes all social media is public, but sometimes, when two or more people are having a real conversation, maybe you should just READ it and not enter it?  Use your better judgement, not every conversation is for you to stick your nose in and drop your 2 cents worth of doo doo and then run.  Sometimes you just need to let shit go without commenting on it.
  4. Don't ask People if they saw your posts.  If they did, maybe they didn't think it was worth replying too?  If they didn't, maybe they too busy not spending 3/4 of there day on Facebook, twitter, instagram, or whatever? Uh yea, let me get back to you on that...
  5. Don't share Amen, Like and "share this" posts.  Fuck you and your Amen and seriously, I don't like anything on social media, well somethings, but certainly nothing you are sharing. I am not a lemming, I do not follow others off a cliff.  Maybe you are, but it's really annoying. Got it? Good.  
  6. Dont complain about everything others post.  Why are you even on Social media if you don't want to hear or communicate?  If you don't like it, GO AWAY! Or better yet, "unfriend" "unfollow" "undo"!
  7. Don't be offended by what people post, then go on your own page to bash what you just saw.  Seriously, you are a little pussy with absolutely ZERO balls or couth.  If you don't like someone or things they post, why are you staying friends with them?  Cut that shit loose.  
  8. Don't post attention getting posts.  If you post something like "at the hospital, send prayers"  damn it, you better be telling us what the hell is wrong!  It is wrong, plain and simple to expect people to not question. That is, unless your wall is so damn boring that you are just seeking attention, there had better be an explanation!
  9. Don't comment on Memes that people post because you don't agree with them.  Memes are meant to be Funny or Satirical for the most part.  Sometimes they are just meant to be ironic, they certainly don't pinpoint or pigeon hole a person's entire existence or views of the world, so don't act as if it does.   They certainly aren't made to start a conversation, more likely they are made as a statement.  Whatever the case, you look like an idiot arguing with a meme.
  10. Don't lecture.  YOU are not the most perfect person in the world.  When you start to lecture, you just look like an idiot and that you are a know-it-all. You can practically hear the eye rolling when people start lecturing, You do not have all the answers.  It is not your place to tell people that, oh you shouldn't do this, or do that, or I'm so right I'm holier than the holiest person that ever walked the earth.  If someone asks for your input by all means, give it to them, but if not, stifle the urge to make yourself look like a asshole.  
In ending, take my advice, don't be a turd on social media.  Your status on social media is that people know of you now since we don't really do face to face anymore.  Do you really want to be known as a hard ass, disrespectful, rogue? Do you want to be known as a self centered know-it-all with a holier than thou complex?  I think not.